Posts tagged

“travel”

Trip to Switzerland

This is like watching two monkeys at the puberty zoo. You won’t regret it, dad. When I kiss Jimmy Jr. under the disco ball, it’ll be like we’re all kissing Jimmy Jr under the disco ball. Ok then, see you on our date! Now my rash smells like bacon. But it doesn’t itch anymore. You…

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The Hunt for Rare Aquatic Plants

There’s a lot of carrots in that stew. Our toaster is also confused. It doesn’t know where bagels go. Buns…sen. I’m just not sure if I’ll be any good on the grill with one free hand.Gene, you saved us. I owe you my life. It’s an erotic friend fiction story that I just wrote. I…

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How to Take Awesome Couple Shots

Dear Diary: Tonight I’m sneaking off to the abandoned taffy factory to look for treasure. Also, if boys had uteruses, they’d be called duderuses. My crotch is itchy. There’s someone behind the milk. Maybe it’s the dairy fairy. Ugg, my heart just pooped its pants. Not if you’re a fish. The hand wants what the…

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Manon’s Trip

How do you know a python ate it? Did it leave a note? I had no idea there was so much butt touching in baseball. My crotch is itchy. You won’t regret it, dad. When I kiss Jimmy Jr. under the disco ball, it’ll be like we’re all kissing Jimmy Jr under the disco ball.…

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